What a Strange Thing is This...?!
(Wellehshemoth/Exodus 16:14-15, Mathiyah 4:4)
The elderly one was just sitting there...You know, on that old weathered and time scarred bench, set back in the shade of one of the huge weeping willow trees surrounding Prince Pond. Almost no one comes here any more too just sit...too busy, I guess.
I couldn't tell the age of the old one. He seemed to be a part of that which somehow belonged there. Was he waiting for someone to come? I wondered if he had been waiting long. I didn't want to disturb him from his thoughts as he gazed over the water.
Something was drawing me closer...
I had been troubled for months about my life, what I was doing and about what I believed. My precious wife was gone. Out only child had been murdered in a terrible act of violence.
Anyway, I was just generally troubled about things. I missed my family that would never return to me, while at the same time thinking that somehow I would see them again.
I remember that little cemetery on the main street where the preachers said a lot of stuff that didn't make sense. Most of it seemed like he just made it up to try and make me feel better. He said they were "With the lord in heaven," and that I would see them again in the :great bye and bye"...whatever that is supposed to mean.
Reading the Bible has been no help. No one seems to really understand what it says and means anyway. People keep telling me, "It's all in the hands of the lord." Frankly, that is no comfort. Why can't these so called men of god just give me the answers to my questions so I can find the strength to go on a little longer?
Sorry, but sometimes if you wan to know the truth, I have the feeling that they don't know any more about these things than I do. That is definitely no comfort.
Life can be so strange and so often without real purpose....
Anyway that is how I happened to be down at Prince Pond that time. Before my love and I were to have our child, we used to go there. I used to wait for her knowing that at any moment she might suddenly appear...usually not. Oh, but when she did...but that is a story for another time.
I really miss her and my child.
When I first saw the old one, he didn't seem to notice me as I walked around the water on that path under the weeping willow trees to a point opposite him and sat upon a weathered bench.
It was so quiet I could hear the fish break the surface of the water as if to greet me like we were old friends, glad to meet again.
I don't know how long I had been sitting there lost in memory, but suddenly I was aware of a presence close by. Somehow the old one had made his way to where I was sitting and had joined me upon the weathered bench.
As he gazed out at the water, he turned slightly and said, "Why don't you just ask?" Which seemed strange to me at the time considering he hadn't said so much as "Hello," or "When does the stage leave for town."
I turned toward him fully expecting to be robbed or worse. He simply continued to gaze over the waters.
Then he did it again!..."I know you are troubled...why don't you just ask?"
I didn't know it showed...even to a complete stranger. I don't know if I was more angry at his intrusion into my personnel grief and memories or more angry at myself for letting it show. Either way, I didn't like it.
At the same time, there was something about the old one's presence that held me with a feeling I couldn't identify or remember having before.
I had asked for answers...friends, preachers, I had even tried to talk to, well, you know, our creators. I actually thought I might get an answer to what troubled me from a "higher power."
Pretty stupid idea considering no one seems to have proof of anything, of what they were saying or of what they believed or didn't believe. So, what did I have to loose by asking the old one. I did want to talk with someone...what better than to speak with someone I would never see again.
So, I thought to myself, "Okay smart guy, I will ask."
I asked him, “Why would any loving god allow the murder of my child and loss of his mother in such a way. She had said many times how she loved this god, so why?"
The old one slowly turned, looked at me and after what seemed like and hour said, "Which god is he of whom you inquire?"
What!!!?? I thought this guy was nuts. "What do you mean 'Which god' I almost shouted at him. He had said to just ask and that was the best he could do?
I said, "You know god!! The one in the Bible!!"
What he said next almost caused my mind to go into melt-down. He said;
"There are many gods and many lords recorded in the writings you mentioned. To which one are you referring? What is his name...if you know it? You see "god" is not a name, nor is "lord" a name. These are pronouns and titles, not personal names."
Well, that just about tore it. I had never heard such thing before. I wondered where he got such an idea. I simply did not have an answer for his question, which was nothing new for me...no answers.
It got worse when he asked me if I knew where in the writings it says, "Our father, set apart, qodesh is your name?" I said it sounded like what people call the lord's prayer." Here is where it got worse when he asked, "Well, what is the father's name and what is his son's name, if you know?"
You guessed it. Things got even worse as he said;
"There is no letter J or J sound in either Hebrew or Greek and that this J letter and sounds only came into existence in the English language some fifteen hundred years ago? So, clearly no one could have called your fathers' masheiyah, "J"esus when speaking Hebrew or Greek to him or anyone else."
"After all, masheiyah Yahoshua was a Hebrew, born of Hebrew parents of the family of Yahdah and descended from that great shepherd and king Dawid who was was also Hebrew.
"The 12 men closest to him were also of 'Hebrew decent.' He said he came in his father's name, so tell me, what is his father's name...What is his son's name, if you know it?"
I was astonished at his words.
Then, after a lingering silence there under the weeping willow trees, he wrote on a piece of old weathered paper, he became silent once again, slowly turned and once again gazed out upon the the waters as if he could see something I could not. I wondered what he saw...
As I say in astonishment and wonder at what he had just said, I turned toward the old one to ask him about these things, but he was gone.
My heart grieved within me. First my beloved and child were lost to me and now, just when I thought I had found someone with my needed answers, the old one was also lost to me. I wondered, would he suddenly appear ever again...?
I say upon that old weathered bench ender the weeping willow trees at Prince Pond for what seemed like an eternity. Maybe if I waited long enough, as I used to wait for my beloved and out child, just maybe he would suddenly appear once again and I could ask him about the questions he had asked me.
Maybe he could tell me if I would ever see my precious loved ones again.
Well, as the light was fading and a gentle breeze whispered through the old weeping willow trees as the fish were breaking the water's surface began to bid farewell, I arose to greet the heartache of memory once again.
As I looked out upon the waters one last time wondering what the old man could see there, a small weathered piece of paper, blown by that gentle breeze, came to my feet.
I stopped to get it. Then, by the bench under the willow tree as thought of my loved ones lingered in my mind, I read these words that had been written;
"Who has dwelled above and come down among men?"
"Who has gathered the winds in his grasp?
"Who has bound the waters in their places?"
"who has established the purpose for all that dwells upon the earth?"
"What is his name and what is his son's name...if you know it?"
("Proverbs" 30:4-6)
What did it all mean...? It all seemed so strange. Yet, the guidance from the old one seemed to bring a renewed possibility of comfort. Maybe the old one would come again.
Then, I almost could hear his voice saying..."Just ask..."
Well, perhaps some other time, if you would like, we can meet at the weathered bench under the weeping willow trees at Prince Pond. The old one and I will wait for you and our other cherished ones.
One day, all will suddenly appear. We will no longer have need to ask...we will know.
A voice out of the wilderness...
"Just ask..."
YAH'S FAMILY
P.O.B. 71
MENTONE, AL., 35984
www.qodeshbeythyahweh.org
